inside jamari fox
inside jamari fox - taking you real deep
i was due for a day to relax.
i have been doing too much.
mentally.
physically.
emotionally.
workwolf-ally.
i felt burnt out and completely over everything.
so what i did?
stayed in bed 95% of the time.
that included:
catching up on the 5th season of “pretty little liars”
sleeping off and on
breaking my “no jack off” fast for the day
deep conditioning my hair
it was a really lazy “me” day.
in between all these things,
i thought about my situation with work wolf.
i came to a decision i think would be best…
stay friends as normal,
even go into “best” straight wolf territory,
but if he ever decided to pursue me for anything other than:
i will politely turn him down.
now before you judge,
and i know you will,
keep reading.
he texted me yesterday to check up on me.
we ended up texting for a pretty long time.
he seems to like it when we talk about “us”,
meaning the present and future dreams of our friendship/lives,
rather than me being nosy and asking him about his love/sex life.
yes.
i am a fox and we’re nosy.
#dealwithit
so even though i wanted to pry,
i decided to ignore my inner nosiness and move on.
see yawl.
i’m growing.
maybe its my self defense mechanism,
but i just want it to stay how it is.
i think i took “being bold” a little too far.
i thought if i asked the right questions,
and questioned him about things,
it would help my case.
it actually makes me look like “the nagging girlfriend”.
you know the ones who get a special “DO NOT ANSWER” in a phone.
maybe simply these 2 emojis:
yeah.
even tho from his actions,
he secretly likes it when i do that.
i’m also going to try not jumping to conclusions.
i can be honest and say i could taken ( x friday’s incident ) wrong.
when he is in a bad mood,
he tends to be real negative.
i will ignore his ass until he cools down.
he is big on “playing your position” as he once told me.
he has a lot of growing to do.
i have a lot of growing to do.
this is all “new” to me.
i’ve never dealt with this kind of straight wolf before.
i will make mistakes especially when i have some kind of feelings.
i won’t apologize for being a dumb ass.
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wait…
lowkey: i do have a question for the foxhole:
how does one ignore to ask about the vixens and hoes in his life?
even when your “inner fox” wants to sniff out an answer?
i think that would help a lot if i can achieve that.